[0.0s] Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[2.2s] You've arrived back in Waterdeep.
[4.2s] Ladies and gentlemen, Nulara Moonbrook, FlintFirebeard, Thea Amastasia, and Nye Ilmich
[9.8s] have returned from Thay to discuss plans of our final move on the Cult of the Dragon.
[15.8s] What can you tell us of your travels to Xanthal's Tower?
[19.8s] We got through that maze. We made it in the tower.
[23.1s] We got the quote unquote dragon mask, but it was a fake.
[27.3s] The same man who you know as Sir István.
[30.5s] What you have is ownership of Xanthal's Tower.
[35.2s] I climb up onto the big boardroom table.
[38.4s] We are not looking to sell the tower to the highest bidder for the fate of Thay Room.
[45.8s] And I kind of bang my axe on the ground like, yeah!
[50.1s] Pound my hand on the table.
[51.5s] I've got one hand in my pocket and one hand is holding a...
[55.4s] Human finger bone.
[56.8s] Oh boy!
[58.5s] You catch the eye of Nye Ilmich.
[61.2s] It will act, when activated, as a scroll of protection from undead.
[68.2s] Everybody comes back to the table.
[70.9s] So where do we stand?
[74.8s] Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[76.7s] We're a D&D 5th edition actual play podcast.
[79.7s] And I'm your dungeon master, Russ More.
[81.4s] And with me today is Carla Johnson.
[84.2s] Hey, ooh, number one.
[86.5s] I play new Laura Moonbrook.
[88.2s] And Amy More.
[90.1s] Apparently Russ doesn't love me as much as he used to.
[92.4s] Oh, come on, you've made that joke already.
[95.4s] I have?
[96.2s] Yep.
[96.4s] Tom's always third, so don't say that because then it's kind of sad
[99.4s] as if Russ doesn't love Tom and he does.
[102.2s] I do.
[103.4s] You should do Tom right now.
[107.4s] Show him you love him, Russ.
[108.9s] Yeah, just taking it completely out of context.
[110.2s] How much do you love him, Russ?
[111.8s] Oh god, I'm Tom Laird.
[115.1s] Hey, that's me.
[115.8s] I just meant he should take my spot.
[120.0s] Not in the marriage.
[122.3s] Just in game.
[122.9s] I'm a pretty good baker, so.
[126.4s] Oh, boy.
[127.3s] Master baker.
[128.4s] Oh, no.
[129.2s] Oh, boy.
[133.1s] Wow, we're 30 seconds in and there's already been a masturbation joke
[137.3s] and a Russ and Tom love on each other joke.
[143.7s] What more do you need?
[145.8s] Really, it's a downward slope from here.
[147.6s] Just drag that podcast over the trash can and get rid of it.
[150.2s] Isn't it usually, though?
[152.0s] If two dudes can't platonically love each other, what can they do?
[155.9s] Of course you can platonically love each other.
[158.3s] The one sentence sounded very sexual.
[159.3s] Yeah, it can also not be platonic.
[161.8s] It did.
[162.5s] You should do Tom next.
[164.1s] Yeah, I should rephrase.
[165.6s] I need to have a mental filter.
[169.4s] Yeah, I mean, that would probably help a lot of situations.
[173.1s] I mean, if you're just realizing that now, I don't think it's ever going to happen, Amy.
[177.1s] To be 31 years to realize of dirty pirate mouth.
[181.8s] Who knew?
[183.0s] Where you can hear more of Amy's dirty pirate mouth is over on Patreon,
[187.4s] Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast,
[189.4s] where you can join the lovely community we have going over there,
[191.9s] which is very fantastic and we love all of you.
[195.8s] Oh, and we also love you if you're not a member of Patreon.
[198.9s] Also, yeah, that's true.
[200.3s] That's very true.
[201.7s] Also love, if you're a frequent listener, if you're a sometimes listener, if you-
[208.0s] If this is your first episode, welcome aboard.
[210.2s] We love you.
[211.3s] Welcome aboard.
[212.5s] You're our favorite.
[213.7s] But also when you're on Patreon, you get an episode dedicated to you.
[216.9s] So that's where I was getting to.
[219.6s] And today's episode is dedicated to Jonathan.
[224.2s] Jonathan Nguyen.
[225.8s] Thanks, Jonathan.
[227.6s] We love that guy.
[229.4s] You too, Bob.
[229.8s] Love that guy.
[231.2s] You know, I haven't DMed in a while when Russ doesn't get a message from Jonathan going,
[235.3s] um, Tom screwed something up.
[238.2s] He is so helpful.
[239.4s] He knows how to play D&D so much better than I don't want to say we do because y'all are great.
[246.0s] I'm not.
[246.8s] And I appreciate him continuing to listen to our podcast,
[250.6s] even though it's probably very frustrating for him.
[253.4s] I'm always up for tips because I'm not great at it.
[257.8s] And it's very helpful when someone's like, oh, hey, you could have done this.
[260.5s] And I'm like, oh my God, I didn't even think of that.
[262.4s] This is amazing.
[263.4s] I can't even drink out of a cup.
[265.2s] I just spilled water everywhere.
[267.6s] So Jonathan, if you have any tips about how I could drink out of a cup,
[272.2s] I would take those as well.
[273.6s] Jonathan, I'm wondering what I should do with my stock portfolio.
[277.0s] And do you have any tips about that?
[278.3s] Diversify, Amy.
[279.5s] We've been over this.
[281.8s] It sounds like we're joking, Jonathan, but we really do appreciate it.
[284.8s] Of course we do.
[285.8s] And all the support you give.
[287.1s] That's what we do.
[288.1s] Fuck it.
[288.4s] Let's play D&D.
[290.6s] All right.
[292.4s] Last time you guys got some finger bones.
[294.7s] Yeah, we did.
[296.0s] Beg your what?
[298.5s] Beg your excuse me.
[300.8s] We got some secret finger bones.
[304.4s] We didn't want to tell anybody about it.
[307.7s] Are we ashamed of our finger bones?
[309.8s] When Carla said it.
[314.7s] This is where this episode is going.
[317.4s] And you are about to find out if there's any take backsies on any on any people.
[325.0s] I wish we had thought at the beginning of this whole council thing,
[328.0s] like, you know, months ago to say, hey, no take backsies.
[334.1s] Oh, that would solve so many problems.
[336.1s] So hopefully nobody does it.
[337.6s] But I mean, we didn't say it.
[340.6s] So I guess legally they're allowed to take see backsie.
[344.0s] That is the law.
[344.8s] So we come back to the council chamber and Lady Laryl Silverhand has just said,
[352.0s] so who's in and who's out?
[353.1s] I can't remember what she said exactly.
[354.5s] So where do we stand?
[356.0s] Yeah.
[356.6s] So where are we at, my bitches?
[359.0s] She's taking a very casual approach to this.
[362.7s] She got real stressed and went and just took a few from the bar,
[366.5s] is what she did.
[367.6s] He looks around and was like, there's a fucking bar here.
[370.0s] Oh, my God.
[370.9s] We need to spend more time in council.
[372.8s] I'd enjoy these more if I was drunk.
[376.2s] Everybody has taken their seats and there's a calm hush over the chamber,
[380.6s] except for you guys talking about the bar.
[384.2s] And she looks around the room and she says,
[388.1s] The Harpers, where do you stand?
[392.6s] And Remilia Haven Tree, who you met in the very first council meeting,
[399.0s] who told you about the Drakorn and where to find Makkoth stands up.
[405.0s] And she says,
[406.4s] The Harpers will pledge the mages and the scouts.
[412.1s] And she sits back down.
[415.1s] Lady Laryl Silverhand asks,
[418.2s] The Order of the Gauntlet.
[420.7s] Onnthar Froome stands up and he says,
[425.2s] Aye, we pledge the pAlydins of the Order of the Gauntlet
[429.4s] and healing clerics to support the fight against Tiamat's forces.
[434.3s] He looks to you and gives a wink.
[437.1s] I like blow him a kiss.
[439.9s] That's nice.
[441.5s] You shoot him a big thumbs up.
[443.5s] Oh, I do love shooting people a big thumbs up.
[446.3s] Flimps into it.
[448.3s] The Emerald Enclave.
[450.9s] Lady Silverhand says,
[452.1s] And Delayne Winterhound stands up.
[456.0s] And he says,
[456.9s] The Emerald Enclave is in the fight
[460.2s] and pledges the druids, treants, and lycanthropes.
[465.7s] And he sits back down.
[466.9s] I blow him a kiss.
[468.7s] Haven't seen Delayne in a while.
[470.7s] And he is looking fly.
[472.6s] Is he looking fine?
[473.5s] He always does.
[474.8s] He looks a little cleaned up for this one.
[477.5s] Less like he's been out in the forest for a thousand days.
[483.6s] I don't know if that's what you were looking for.
[485.0s] Maybe you were looking for the dirty...
[486.2s] I'd like to be a little more rugged, but it's okay.
[489.0s] That's fair.
[490.2s] Lady Leryl says,
[492.7s] For the Lord's Alliance, I will speak to Waterdeep.
[497.2s] And we will pledge the resources of Waterdeep's army and conscript troops.
[503.1s] Lord Dagult Neverember stands up and he says,
[505.8s] Neverwinter is here to fight.
[508.5s] And we will provide conscript troops and mercenaries from around the world.
[515.0s] Ambassador Conrad Braunenville,
[517.6s] the male dwarf from Mithril Hall, stands up and he says,
[521.8s] Mithril Hall will pledge resources of dwarven fighters,
[526.6s] dwarf-forged armaments, and siege weapons to aid in this battle.
[531.8s] Marshal Alder Ravengaard from Baldur's Gate.
[536.1s] stands up and he says,
[538.0s] For the Lord's Alliance, we will pledge flaming-fist warriors
[542.5s] and expert advisors to train your conscript troops.
[547.4s] More like Baldur's Gate, am I right?
[550.0s] Right?
[552.0s] He looks and gives you a nod.
[556.8s] King Melandrich stands up and says,
[559.4s] The elven eldritch knights will join forces.
[564.6s] Terran Thunderspell's hornblade of silvery moon stands up and he says,
[569.1s] The army of silvery moon, the knights in silver,
[573.4s] and the silvery moon conscripts will join the battle against the cult of the dragon.
[580.4s] Sir Istvall is the last of the Lord's Alliance to stand up.
[584.2s] And he looks around the room and looks to Anthar Frum and he says,
[591.5s] We will pledge the might of Cormyr, including our purple dragon knights and war wizards.
[602.5s] And he sits down and Anthar looks a bit
[607.8s] surprised by the fact that Sir Istvall has pledged his resources.
[614.6s] He's like, that's not what we talked about, bro.
[616.6s] Also, was purple dragon knight a class option? Cause I'm interested.
[620.6s] Yeah, it sounds super cool.
[622.3s] We'll talk about it.
[624.2s] Ryan Nightshade of the Zhentarim stands up.
[628.7s] And she looks to your group and Lady Silverhand says,
[632.2s] Where does the Zhentarim stand?
[635.1s] Ryan Nightshade takes one last look at your group and says,
[637.9s] We will pledge the assassins and the mercenaries that the Zhentarim has to offer.
[646.2s] And she sits back down.
[647.6s] And Lady Silverhand looks around the room and says,
[653.8s] Well, that's everyone here, all following the actions that you have set forth.
[663.4s] And she looks to your group.
[665.6s] We know that we have the support of the metallic dragons.
[670.7s] They will be at our side.
[674.5s] The airships are readied and awaiting deployment.
[678.5s] We shall leave for the Well of the Dragons in but two days.
[684.2s] It is now up to everyone here to ready their troops.
[688.8s] It will be a long journey,
[692.6s] as the might of our force far exceeds the ability to transport them by air.
[700.0s] You all are to make final arrangements because this battle
[708.8s] is not a battle that everyone will come home from.
[714.7s] Thank you for your support.
[719.2s] We will do our best to stop the Cult of the Dragon as a combined force.
[725.9s] And hopefully, a stronger force.
[732.2s] There's a round of applause that begins to go through the chamber.
[737.6s] The mood begins to lighten a little bit.
[739.4s] There seems to be a little hope now that everybody knows that everyone else is in the fight for good.
[747.5s] So go, ready your forces, spend time with those you care about.
[754.6s] Sleep tonight and hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.
[764.3s] And everybody stands up and begins to leave the room.
[771.3s] Ah, well, you guys want to go get drunk?
[775.4s] I mean, yeah, yeah, probably.
[779.2s] Yeah, probably.
[780.8s] We should do it now because then we, like,
[783.4s] cannot drink tomorrow.
[784.6s] We'll be fresh and ready to go when it's time to leave.
[787.4s] Yeah, that's a good call.
[788.7s] You're such a planner.
[789.8s] I love it.
[791.4s] Gotta plan those hangovers.
[793.5s] Uh, hey, Leo-san, what you up to?
[796.8s] Um, well, there's lots of paperwork now that needs to be done.
[802.2s] What are you up to?
[803.8s] Uh, we were going to head to the local tavern
[807.4s] and, you know, thought maybe you might want to come with.
[810.3s] Yawning Portal, join us for a drink.
[813.3s] Eh?
[814.2s] And I'm elbowing him a little bit.
[816.4s] I know I've turned you down in the past, but I think-
[819.5s] Yeah, like every time.
[821.0s] I think today is probably a good day to join you.
[824.6s] Fuck yeah, the world might be ending.
[826.2s] Let's go get a drink.
[829.0s] Fuck yeah.
[832.6s] I clap him on the shoulder, lead him out of the room.
[837.6s] You guys head to the Yawning Portal.
[839.7s] As we're walking there, I kind of like sidle up to him and I'm like,
[845.7s] um, hey, have you ever seen one of these?
[848.6s] And I pull out the finger bone.
[853.4s] That's a human finger bone.
[858.0s] You guys keep weird things.
[859.5s] Yeah, um, it was actually secretly, sneakily given to us
[865.4s] by Tharchin Asseldra.
[866.8s] Yes.
[868.5s] You know, not that I don't trust that bitch.
[871.6s] Cause no, I don't.
[873.7s] I don't trust that bitch.
[875.3s] So I just, you know, wanted a second opinion on it.
[879.0s] Niall Mitch assures us that it is for protection from the undead armies
[885.8s] that the defected or the exile Red Wizards could conjure.
[892.2s] But I just, she made it seem like we should keep it secret and I don't like that.
[899.1s] Well, they've pledged their allegiance and their forces.
[903.0s] Yes.
[903.4s] So what good would it be to harm those they've pledged to assist?
[910.6s] Well, I don't know.
[911.4s] I just don't know why all the secrets.
[914.0s] So I just needed, I just didn't feel good about Ilios
[916.6s] and I just had to get it off my chest.
[918.2s] I mean, we could take it down to Arvid
[920.8s] and he could take a look at it.
[923.0s] Oh man, we should talk to Arvid before we leave.
[926.4s] But first a drink.
[928.7s] Okay. Cause we're walking by his office right here.
[931.0s] He could probably-
[931.8s] Guys, is it okay if we pop into Arvid's or?
[934.2s] Yeah, by all means.
[937.7s] You enter the armory and potions plus for the castle.
[941.9s] Very mercantile name.
[944.0s] Well, he's super creepy.
[945.5s] Everything seems like it would be like really stark and sterile.
[949.8s] You enter and he's writing on a ledger.
[953.7s] He looks up and he says, oh, hello.
[963.6s] Have you ever seen one of these and I show him my finger bone?
[969.6s] Yes. That is a human finger.
[975.0s] And what about the spell that accompanies it?
[979.4s] Well, you know, it's a spell.
[982.2s] You know, it's school.
[984.6s] Abjuration.
[986.1s] Well, it seems you don't need me.
[988.4s] Oh my God.
[990.6s] So you don't have any other information about this?
[994.7s] I jest.
[995.7s] Oh, it's-
[996.4s] You jest what?
[997.6s] He's just goofing, guys.
[1000.9s] We should have guessed you're such a jokester.
[1003.5s] Somebody finger bone us and we just need to make sure that it's legit.
[1010.2s] Push past it.
[1015.7s] Get it together, Arvis.
[1019.4s] It's Arvid.
[1021.3s] Wow. I don't know why that was my reaction.
[1024.4s] Sorry. You're right. Names are important.
[1028.1s] Yes, of course. Give me the finger.
[1032.2s] Are you telling me you want me to finger you?
[1037.0s] I'm sorry. I'm drinking vodka.
[1040.1s] It's supposed to be rum. Sean says it has to be rum.
[1043.0s] I didn't have rum.
[1044.4s] Well, the vodka was already in the fridge and cold.
[1046.9s] It's in the box. He's already packed it.
[1048.6s] Oh, the box is open. I didn't seal that one up.
[1052.9s] Okay. Well, this was cold. Anyway, I hand him the finger bone.
[1058.2s] He looks it over, takes it behind- up a step behind a half wall.
[1065.4s] I follow him.
[1066.6s] You can't. There's a counter.
[1070.2s] How does he get up there?
[1071.5s] He's behind the counter.
[1072.4s] Well, he's behind the counter.
[1074.4s] Does the counter not lift up?
[1075.7s] Think a pharmacy.
[1076.9s] Yes. Does the counter not lift up?
[1079.2s] He sees you begin to lift it up. He says, please don't.
[1082.6s] Respect the counter.
[1084.5s] Okay. But can you say this in sight?
[1086.2s] I will respect your counter.
[1087.5s] Can you not see me?
[1089.1s] I don't know. Can I? You said he walked behind a half wall.
[1092.6s] Yeah. He went up step like in a pharmacy.
[1095.7s] Follow my narrative.
[1097.4s] I know. Sorry. I just freaked out a little bit.
[1099.4s] I'm like, oh my God, what if he's evil?
[1101.4s] What if he takes my fucking finger bone and it was a protection spell?
[1105.3s] And I gave it to him and he made it not workable.
[1110.3s] I mean, I think since he works here,
[1111.8s] you're probably over reading the situation.
[1114.1s] Yeah. That's the vodka.
[1116.5s] Okay. Sorry, Arvid. Go ahead.
[1119.8s] He begins working with some beakers and vials.
[1124.2s] Is there a Bunsen burner?
[1126.1s] Well, there's a magical Bunsen burner. It's just a flame in the air.
[1131.9s] Is there some titration that's happening?
[1133.4s] Yeah. Oh yeah. There's definite titration liquids bubbling in the background.
[1138.2s] And he dips the finger into some liquid and it turns a bright purple.
[1146.0s] Is purple good? I like purple.
[1148.5s] Well, if protection from the undead is what you are hoping for,
[1154.2s] then yes, purple is very good.
[1157.4s] I really do like the color purple. Purple for protection. Thanks, Arvid.
[1161.0s] He walks slowly back down the step and extends the finger towards you.
[1167.4s] It gives you the finger.
[1170.2s] Make a dexterity check.
[1173.9s] I'm trying to make sure I don't touch him.
[1178.8s] That is six plus two, one.
[1184.7s] Now, is this just to avoid touching him?
[1186.6s] Seven.
[1187.7s] Or to take the finger from him.
[1191.2s] He pulls the finger back and smiles a little bit.
[1194.6s] Oh, God. Is this a pretty woman moment where he's like snaps it on me and I go...
[1202.1s] Yep. That's exactly what happened.
[1204.1s] It's off-lane.
[1205.0s] If you could cue Roy Orbison's pretty woman right here.
[1210.1s] Are you charmed by him now? Do you like him now?
[1214.4s] I hate it when people do stuff like this to me.
[1216.3s] He hands it back to you and says, just joking.
[1219.8s] Oh, you're such a trickster and I take it from him.
[1223.1s] And I turn around like my smile immediately and I turn around and I'm like, oh, my God.
[1228.6s] Is my finger permanently purple or was it just the liquid that turned purple?
[1232.2s] It was just the liquid that turned purple.
[1233.4s] Okay, cool. I'm walking out.
[1236.6s] I had done like that and turned around and I'm like, oh, my God, that guy.
[1242.2s] He says, before you leave next, come back and see me.
[1249.1s] I have something helpful.
[1253.4s] Well, can we get it now?
[1254.7s] We're here now. Can we have it now?
[1257.2s] I'm working on it.
[1260.2s] Okay. I mean, we're leaving really soon.
[1263.6s] I will have it ready before you leave.
[1267.6s] Okay.
[1268.6s] Come see me.
[1270.4s] All right.
[1271.1s] Any any hint as to what it is?
[1273.6s] Something good or is it?
[1275.4s] Yes.
[1275.8s] Is it going to be something?
[1277.0s] Yes, it will be good.
[1280.3s] Okay, she'll believe it when she sees it.
[1282.1s] I've been brewing up some new potions.
[1287.0s] It's not going to turn me yellow, is it?
[1288.3s] Okay.
[1288.8s] Why would it turn you yellow?
[1290.5s] I'm already on board.
[1291.4s] You had me at not going to turn me yellow.
[1296.0s] I am here.
[1297.4s] I'm here to assist not to play mean pranks like some sort of five-year-old.
[1304.3s] Ozark, am I right?
[1308.7s] Ozark.
[1310.8s] You know, from Ozark's Bizard.
[1312.9s] You heard of him?
[1313.8s] No.
[1315.2s] All right.
[1315.8s] Bye.
[1318.8s] Okay, bye.
[1319.8s] Okay, bye.
[1321.0s] I'm not about to explain Ozark and his Bizard to him.
[1324.4s] Oh, that's part of the guilt.
[1325.8s] You're not supposed to tell anybody about that.
[1328.7s] It's like a whole other level, man.
[1332.6s] I didn't know.
[1335.8s] You know what?
[1336.2s] I sort of forgot he was like-
[1337.6s] Lab secrets all over the place or whatever.
[1339.3s] Part of secret organization ruling the multiverse.
[1342.2s] Yeah, it's fine.
[1346.0s] Anyways, so you leave.
[1348.6s] You head to the yawning portal.
[1353.3s] You open the door and it is bustling.
[1357.8s] There is a mix of people who look very concerned
[1363.1s] and people who look like they're celebrating.
[1367.4s] Now Russ, would you say that every day it's bustling?
[1373.1s] Add it.
[1373.7s] Add it to Spotify.
[1375.0s] Yep.
[1376.0s] I would.
[1377.9s] Every day.
[1378.3s] Perfect.
[1378.8s] Every day it's bustling.
[1381.3s] That's doing the rest.
[1384.8s] No.
[1385.1s] I will not.
[1385.9s] I will not get sued by Party Rock.
[1389.9s] What are you doing?
[1391.2s] Do we see anyone we know?
[1393.8s] I mean, you came in with Leosin.
[1397.1s] No, we're looking for someone with a table, Russ.
[1399.9s] Leosin doesn't have a table.
[1401.7s] There are a couple tables.
[1404.0s] It's bustling, but it's not full.
[1405.9s] So there are a few tables.
[1407.0s] You see Dernan, he's at the bar serving.
[1411.5s] He sees you walk in and he lifts a glass,
[1415.2s] giving you the signal that he'll be over with some drinks in a moment.
[1419.9s] Nobody of great note that you really recognize, no.
[1424.9s] Okay.
[1426.6s] Well, let's go sit at our table and like, you know, have a debrief.
[1433.6s] Totally.
[1434.4s] Wait, we're getting naked?
[1437.2s] Please, as if you were briefs anyway.
[1440.4s] Guilty as charged.
[1441.9s] Yeah.
[1442.4s] Um.
[1443.2s] Tom, roll a d20.
[1444.9s] Whoa.
[1448.0s] Speaking of.
[1448.8s] Say 14.
[1449.9s] You're flipped.
[1450.5s] You're good.
[1451.5s] Okay.
[1453.2s] Is there any music playing or anything?
[1455.2s] Yeah, there's a bard playing in the corner.
[1457.6s] Nice.
[1458.3s] Thea gets up and starts to dance.
[1461.0s] Like a Nulara's like, you want a debrief?
[1463.0s] And Thea just starts dancing.
[1465.1s] And Thea says, yeah.
[1467.0s] Yeah, but first this is my song.
[1470.6s] All right.
[1470.9s] Like I'm just feeling the music at the moment.
[1473.9s] Describe to me how Thea.
[1476.6s] It is very much for all the friends fans in the crowd.
[1481.5s] It is very much a Phoebe Buffet style of dancing.
[1486.2s] Like a lot of like swishy arm movements,
[1489.1s] like when she's trying to seduce Chandler.
[1491.4s] And like, like weird, like claw hand movements and stuff like that.
[1495.8s] It's not very elegant.
[1497.5s] Thea didn't get to go to any sort of like,
[1500.8s] like, you know, dances and stuff like that when she was younger.
[1504.0s] So.
[1504.4s] No Julliard equivalent.
[1506.0s] You were taking scribe lessons.
[1507.8s] You weren't taking dance lessons.
[1509.4s] There were no sock hops for Thea.
[1511.2s] So.
[1512.3s] So, so while this amazing dancing is happening,
[1515.8s] what like I'm picturing the music to be like,
[1519.3s] you know, barred kind of music.
[1523.1s] Like it doesn't fit the dance at all.
[1525.0s] Yeah, it's like minstrel type music.
[1526.7s] Yeah.
[1527.1s] Yeah, yeah.
[1528.3s] Yeah, exactly.
[1529.5s] It doesn't really maybe go exactly with the dancing
[1533.5s] in addition to the dancing being very nice.
[1537.0s] It's more of like a stress reliever.
[1539.3s] Yeah, that's fair.
[1539.9s] Yeah, just while we're waiting for our drink.
[1542.4s] I like it.
[1542.9s] I know you haven't even had a single drink yet
[1544.7s] and you're already dancing.
[1545.7s] Well, that's what you think.
[1546.6s] I'm pretty sure Thea has a flask on her somewhere.
[1548.8s] So as I see the scene playing out,
[1551.6s] Flint, Thea, Nularaaa, and Leosin and Donnie
[1553.9s] were heading over to a table to go debrief.
[1556.8s] How do they respond to Thea's impromptu claws?
[1561.9s] Flint is sitting there and he kind of nudges Nularaaa.
[1564.8s] He says, oh, she going to do the tiger claw
[1568.1s] right if she does the tiger claw?
[1569.9s] Of course.
[1571.5s] Yeah, I think like, I mean, this is we've been together
[1574.3s] a long time.
[1574.8s] This is not the first time we are seeing these moves.
[1578.2s] So I think we just are like, or I shouldn't say we.
[1582.8s] Nularaaa is just like indulgently smiling.
[1586.5s] Like, oh, yes.
[1588.1s] You guys have had sleepovers, I get it.
[1590.2s] You have fun.
[1591.6s] You're having a good time up there and I'm glad you're glad.
[1594.4s] Oh, and I do the thing where I try to get you to come dance with me
[1597.2s] and you're like, no, actually, no, Thea, no.
[1599.4s] No, definitely no.
[1601.5s] Maybe Donnie dances with you.
[1603.5s] I motion for Donnie to come dance.
[1605.2s] Oh, Donnie, Donnie comes and dances.
[1608.5s] As I think we mentioned last episode,
[1610.3s] he is still like pretty new in his in his larger body.
[1614.0s] So, you know, when he's fighting and stuff,
[1615.9s] he is like, you know, kind of hyper aware and good.
[1619.6s] Give me a dexterity saving throw for Donnie.
[1621.9s] Oh, gosh.
[1622.5s] Okay. Oh, gosh.
[1623.5s] I already, I mean, it's not great already.
[1628.7s] I can't remember what it is.
[1630.1s] Donnie Rowland.
[1630.8s] Yeah, no, it's a six.
[1632.7s] It's a six he got.
[1634.1s] So Donnie bumps into a lot of people.
[1636.9s] Um, and a couple of them get quite upset at this.
[1641.8s] And they stand up and then they look at a dragon dancing
[1645.2s] and then they get quite scared.
[1647.4s] Yeah, I noticed this interaction and dancing like beside
[1651.9s] and every time he bumps into someone,
[1653.4s] I'm always kind of like right.
[1654.4s] And I'm like, oh, it's okay, buddy.
[1656.3s] Um, and I'm trying to smooth things over with people
[1659.1s] be like, listen, could be, could be our last night to dance.
[1661.7s] Just they nod and sit back down and keep an eye on you.
[1667.3s] So Donnie, why don't we, why don't we go sit down?
[1669.5s] Cause he's actually starting to injure people now
[1671.7s] and cause, um, like destruction of property
[1676.3s] and things like that.
[1677.5s] And we love Dernan.
[1680.1s] Yeah, we like Dernan.
[1681.6s] So we don't want to wreck this place.
[1683.2s] No, we're putting the trash as far.
[1685.1s] I mean, Dernan's no beefy stew, but he's pretty cool.
[1688.2s] Exactly. He's pretty cool.
[1690.7s] Dernan, in fact, brings, uh, uh, some, some
[1693.9s] Stein's over and lays, puts them down on the table.
[1697.9s] Um, this is, uh, so, uh, been, been up to anything,
[1701.3s] anything fun?
[1703.0s] We own Zalvo's tower now.
[1705.9s] Congratulations.
[1707.5s] Yeah, I guess so. I don't know.
[1709.1s] Yeah, it's all new to us.
[1710.3s] We don't really know how to feel about it yet.
[1712.6s] Ever, ever owned a piece of real estate before?
[1715.7s] No, kind of been more wanderers.
[1718.0s] Travelers, adventurers, you know.
[1719.7s] Well, you know, buy low, sell high.
[1721.3s] That's what my, uh, my grandpappy used to tell me.
[1724.2s] We didn't have to buy at all.
[1726.2s] Hey, you bought as low as you can.
[1728.4s] As low as possible.
[1729.6s] Get the highest price you can.
[1731.1s] Nothing but up from here.
[1732.7s] I guess so.
[1734.8s] Good advice. Good advice. Thanks, Dernan.
[1737.4s] Yeah. Yeah, no problem. Anytime.
[1739.7s] How about you? You been up to anything?
[1741.4s] Uh, just, you know, tendon, tendon, tendon bar.
[1743.8s] Seeing, uh, there's lots of, lots of people,
[1745.8s] lots of people through here.
[1746.9s] Have you seen Grog recently?
[1747.9s] Our?
[1748.7s] Uh, who's Grog?
[1750.2s] Grog. Sorry, Grog.
[1751.5s] Uh, oh, Grog. Yeah, yeah.
[1754.0s] You know, like, alcohol, damn it.
[1755.5s] You know, higher wine.
[1757.9s] I mean, I just thought maybe you knew something.
[1760.3s] I didn't. Yeah.
[1761.1s] Uh, yeah, Grog hasn't been through, uh,
[1763.2s] in the last, uh, couple days.
[1764.5s] He was here through, uh, for the festival there
[1767.1s] and then, uh, he's kind of just gone his own way.
[1769.5s] You know him, he kind of comes and goes as he pleases.
[1772.6s] He sure does.
[1774.5s] How are, how are people doing?
[1777.1s] I know it's real crowded here and everyone's,
[1779.9s] you know, things aren't great right now,
[1782.2s] but we're gonna make things are coming.
[1787.1s] Everybody's, uh, rightfully concerned.
[1793.5s] Everybody's displaced from, from wherever they came from.
[1798.6s] They want to get back,
[1799.6s] but they don't know if they can go back.
[1802.7s] Well, you know what?
[1803.3s] What you're doing here is super important.
[1806.2s] Just a safe place to go with community,
[1808.9s] friends, laughter, and drinks,
[1811.7s] and just pretend like everything's okay for a few hours.
[1816.4s] Good on you, Dernan.
[1818.1s] Thank you. Thank you.
[1819.9s] What you, what you guys are doing,
[1821.4s] uh, really is, uh, is bringing up the spirits of everybody
[1826.3s] and he points to a banner that's hanging over the,
[1832.8s] uh, over the pit in the middle of the yawning portal
[1835.9s] and it is the symbol of the decimator of dragons,
[1840.3s] decimators of dragons.
[1842.6s] He says, what you, what you four are doing is, uh, is noble.
[1850.1s] Not a lot of people or adventurers or anybody,
[1853.5s] for that matter, might do what you guys have done.
[1857.9s] Well, thank you.
[1860.2s] He nods and, uh, he gets called over from across the bar.
[1863.9s] He says, I'll be around.
[1865.8s] If you need anything, just let me know.
[1867.8s] And he walks off.
[1870.3s] I drink my drink.
[1873.4s] So guys, how do we, how do we feel?
[1877.2s] Nobody backed out.
[1879.2s] I am really surprised, especially Ryan.
[1882.3s] I was pretty impressed.
[1883.2s] Man, I thought Ryan for sure.
[1884.7s] Ryan seemed shady.
[1886.2s] So I'm extra glad that we made our stance about the tower known
[1890.9s] because, you know, could have got tricked into something there.
[1895.7s] Yeah, and could have, could have had a lot of guilt attached to
[1899.5s] if she had pulled out and not offered support.
[1904.1s] But you know what?
[1904.7s] That's all in the past.
[1905.5s] Let's celebrate this, this really big win.
[1908.7s] We have a great team.
[1911.5s] There ever was one to defeat the rise of a horrible dragon goddess.
[1917.7s] Cheers.
[1918.3s] Yeah, I mean, cheers to that.
[1920.0s] Leosin, who was a small man, tries to lift the stein of a beer.
[1924.8s] And he lifts it with two hands and he goes to cheers you as well.
[1929.1s] He says, you, you guys have no idea how close it was at some points
[1934.5s] to many, many, many factions running, running for the hills.
[1938.9s] Oh man.
[1939.4s] He's going to drink and get loose-lipped.
[1941.2s] I know.
[1941.8s] Tell us more, tell us more.
[1944.3s] He sips.
[1945.1s] It must have been very stressful for you.
[1947.4s] I have filled out so much paperwork.
[1950.3s] You have no idea.
[1952.8s] You were the only place that you're the only reason that place is running.
[1956.3s] You're telling me you're telling me and he takes a big swig.
[1960.1s] You get good compensation.
[1962.7s] I mean, as good as can be expected.
[1964.7s] I mean, they treating you well.
[1966.3s] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[1967.3s] Just making sure you're a real awesome guy.
[1969.0s] Management has changed a few times since I've been,
[1972.2s] since I've been here, but yeah, Lady, Lady Silverhand, she's, she's good.
[1977.1s] She's good to me.
[1978.6s] So Leosin, who, who seem like they might not be on board?
[1984.3s] Cause it's, I mean, what we're doing is it's so obvious that
[1986.8s] it's the right thing to stop the rise of Tiamat.
[1989.9s] Um, yeah, um, well, the Zhentarim, it's always a question whether,
[1997.2s] I mean, even now that they've said their support,
[1999.3s] whether they actually show up.
[2000.7s] That's always a big question.
[2003.4s] Um.
[2004.0s] Shady people.
[2005.5s] Sir Istval, he's seen a lot of battle and his stance has been that
[2011.4s] he wouldn't put him in his forces behind something he didn't believe in.
[2016.2s] And he wasn't sure about, as he put it, you three yahoos.
[2022.1s] I mean, it's pretty fair.
[2023.4s] That's fair.
[2024.7s] We've been called worse.
[2026.2s] Oh, much worse.
[2029.1s] He was a, he was a big question.
[2030.8s] King Melandritch, uh, he's, he's a bit of a hothead
[2036.0s] and, uh, disappeared a little bit after he found out about Nerenvain.
[2040.5s] Yeah. I mean, that, that couldn't have been easy for him to hear.
[2043.4s] No, we weren't sure about him and the Elven, Elvendritch knights.
[2047.7s] So, um, there were a couple others, but, uh, they have all come around
[2053.3s] and it appears that we have full forces going into what, what is to come.
[2058.7s] How are you three feeling about what is to come?
[2063.9s] Is there anything that we can do for you in order to help you prepare?
[2074.2s] Is there anyone who can enhance my abilities a little bit?
[2079.1s] Uh, how, how do you mean?
[2081.1s] My spell casting abilities.
[2084.4s] Um, you want like a magic tutor?
[2087.4s] Yeah, well, you know, maybe someone to teach me a few new tricks, you know, like.
[2091.5s] Um, well, I mean, you three are some of the most powerful adventurers.
[2099.9s] Are you trying to scare us?
[2103.3s] Are you trying to terrify us?
[2104.7s] But if you look, if you look what you can do and what you have done.
[2110.5s] This is pretty awesome.
[2112.4s] Your powers and abilities are, are.
[2116.3s] Okay, fine.
[2116.7s] How about some healing potions?
[2118.4s] I dare say it godlike.
[2122.0s] Well, that's going to go to Thea's head.
[2127.3s] We like to stay humble, so.
[2131.0s] I know.
[2131.6s] I just, I don't want you to underestimate the powers that you have going into this
[2137.0s] battle that you have.
[2139.7s] You have them, just make sure you use them.
[2144.3s] I.e. don't forget shit.
[2146.7s] Always get advice.
[2148.7s] More what I was talking about is final, final arrangements.
[2153.4s] Where, where do you come from?
[2155.8s] Where is your families?
[2156.8s] Where do you wish to have your worldly possessions sent back to if the worst happens?
[2167.1s] The worst happens, you can send my knapsack back to my parents in silvery moon.
[2173.2s] Oh, Leo-san, it's so like you to be talking to us about like legal paperwork here at
[2179.9s] the bar as we're chatting.
[2181.6s] And I, you know what?
[2183.4s] We appreciate you for being you.
[2185.9s] I'm just trying to look out for you.
[2188.8s] What I'm saying is, is if there is somewhere you wish to go, we can make that happen.
[2196.6s] I should go see my folks.
[2199.0s] Well, it's been a while since you've been back there.
[2201.8s] Yeah, but I guess if not now, when?
[2204.9s] I mean, how could they be disappointed in me now?
[2207.5s] I'm about to help save the world.
[2209.3s] You're a decimator of dragons.
[2210.9s] Right.
[2211.2s] And you're pretty much godlike.
[2213.1s] Exactly.
[2215.6s] They're going to be happy to see you.
[2217.8s] What do you think, Leo-san?
[2219.0s] Get me a ship up there tomorrow?
[2222.8s] I will do one better than a ship.
[2225.5s] Don't worry.
[2226.7s] A super ship.
[2229.0s] A mega ship.
[2230.9s] We have two days.
[2232.7s] Half ship, half dinosaur.
[2236.5s] Wow.
[2237.3s] Well, shouldn't, shouldn't Nularaaaa ride that then?
[2240.2s] Yes, yeah.
[2241.1s] Nularaaaa, take me up the silvery moon on your half ship, half dinosaur.
[2249.1s] Leo-san, I would love to go see my family too.
[2251.9s] I haven't been, been home to High Forest in years and I'd love to see my brothers.
[2257.1s] And they probably, gosh, you know,
[2259.7s] I bet I have like a million nieces and nephews now.
[2263.4s] That can be arranged, absolutely.
[2267.9s] And you, Flint?
[2270.2s] Yeah, it's been a long time since I've been back to Mithril Hall, so
[2274.6s] I guess, in Thea's words, if not now, then when?
[2278.5s] In the morning it shall be done.
[2280.9s] I will send you to Mithril Hall, High Forest, and Silvery Moon
[2284.6s] and arrange, as I have done for everybody, final papers as to direct your possessions,
[2295.1s] your earnings, your whatever you have left for you.
[2300.8s] Well, how are you going to get a tower delivered there?
[2306.4s] Yes, the question of Xanthal's Tower.
[2310.2s] Where do you guys stand on Xanthal's Tower?
[2311.9s] Like, what do you want to do with that?
[2314.6s] Oh my gosh, you know what, if we die, we should leave it to Greg.
[2317.5s] Or, uh, or, uh, Flamikins.
[2320.3s] I mean, you guys, I don't necessarily think she's the most responsible person to have the tower,
[2326.2s] but she is kind of technically the one that kind of got us into the tower, sort of.
[2330.7s] Okay, what about her and Thaddeus?
[2336.4s] Yes.
[2336.7s] Okay, the yin to the yang.
[2338.8s] The joint custody.
[2340.3s] If it is, if it passes, you know, by those who have entered it.
[2345.4s] I mean, they're partial owners.
[2347.1s] That's true.
[2348.3s] So that seems right to me.
[2350.5s] Okay, can you make that happen?
[2352.9s] I will absolutely make that happen.
[2355.3s] Awesome.
[2357.9s] I drink more.
[2359.4s] He too drinks more.
[2360.8s] Oh yeah, since I'm drinking this whole time.
[2361.9s] We've been drinking the whole time.
[2363.5s] Everybody make a constitution saving throw.
[2365.4s] Uh oh.
[2366.7s] Thea got a four plus.
[2372.4s] Yeah, you can't be poisoned.
[2373.5s] You're fine.
[2375.7s] Alcohol is a poison.
[2378.8s] We were like, oh, yeah.
[2381.9s] Dernan.
[2384.1s] Dernan's been a sleeper agent this whole time.
[2386.2s] This whole time.
[2387.2s] What a surprise.
[2388.1s] Uh, Flint, you make it with resistance.
[2392.0s] I only rolled a seven, so I'm one drunk as fuck.
[2394.3s] You're drunk as fuck.
[2395.5s] I'm drunk as fuck.
[2395.8s] It was some strong stuff.
[2398.5s] Nularaaaia, you and Leosin are drunk as all get out.
[2402.6s] What did Flint roll?
[2404.4s] I have resistant to poison.
[2406.7s] I think my 11 is probably good enough.
[2409.1s] Yeah, you're fine.
[2411.4s] So Leosin's like, you know what, you guys, since I met you
[2417.6s] at that cave with the people who made me work so hard,
[2422.4s] they were not good owners, bosses.
[2425.9s] The cult of the dragon.
[2427.2s] They were bad.
[2428.0s] They're bad people.
[2429.0s] I'm glad we're stopping them.
[2431.2s] Yeah.
[2431.9s] Oh, I hate the cult of the dragon, you guys.
[2434.5s] They're the worst.
[2436.2s] So bad.
[2437.6s] We're totally gonna, we're gonna stop them, right?
[2440.0s] If Tiamat was here right now, tell me, what would you do?
[2444.0s] I would punch her in the, what do dragons have?
[2449.0s] Well, she's got a lot of different heads.
[2451.4s] Like so many heads.
[2452.9s] Punch her in the head, the least bitey head.
[2457.6s] I'd punch her in the most bitey head.
[2459.3s] Don't let that go right after that.
[2461.0s] There's white, there's black, there's blue, there's green.
[2464.0s] What color says punch me?
[2464.7s] When you're done with her, they're all gonna be black and blue.
[2466.9s] Black and blue.
[2474.2s] I'd punch her in all her faces.
[2478.0s] I'm very fast.
[2479.6s] Are you?
[2480.3s] He punches and he's very fast.
[2482.9s] Well, he's a monk.
[2483.6s] I steady all the glasses on the table.
[2488.0s] Wow.
[2488.7s] Okay, okay.
[2489.7s] If you could bone anyone in this, in this tavern.
[2494.4s] What about her?
[2495.1s] I point over, I point over to a...
[2499.8s] I know the man of the faith.
[2502.1s] I can't do that.
[2503.2s] Not at all?
[2504.1s] No.
[2505.8s] What about kissing?
[2507.2s] No.
[2507.9s] Some smooching?
[2509.0s] Some hugging?
[2509.5s] Smoochies?
[2510.1s] No.
[2510.5s] Can you hold hands?
[2511.5s] No.
[2512.7s] Could you rub up against each other?
[2514.8s] Close on.
[2516.0s] No.
[2517.4s] Yeah.
[2519.0s] I don't like where this conversation is going.
[2521.0s] This base system, the system of bases in Silvery Moon is fascinating.
[2527.2s] There are many bases.
[2528.0s] First base, rubbing up against each other.
[2530.8s] Baseball's a very long sport.
[2533.2s] Second base, holding hands.
[2535.2s] Who says in Silvery Moon, you run to first base first?
[2542.4s] You're right.
[2542.9s] You know our baseball system.
[2545.8s] Amy creates whole new baseball system.
[2549.6s] Elves are freaky, y'all.
[2551.1s] This is how it's played in Silvery Moon.
[2554.0s] Tom Rollers, E20.
[2559.0s] It's a nine.
[2560.4s] You're bored.
[2562.3s] I'm not wearing any underwear.
[2564.8s] He knows what's up.
[2566.0s] You've played baseball in Silvery Moon.
[2567.2s] Why do you always tell us about your underwear, Flint?
[2569.4s] So weird.
[2570.8s] She wants me to rub up against people and he doesn't wear any underwear.
[2574.8s] I didn't say you had to rub up against people.
[2577.7s] I was just wondering.
[2578.7s] I am not of the faith of any faith.
[2580.8s] I barely have faith in myself.
[2583.8s] You know what?
[2584.3s] Let me tell you a secret.
[2585.8s] I've never rubbed up against anybody.
[2588.8s] All right, Theo.
[2589.5s] I'll turn it back on you.
[2590.5s] If there was someone in this bar to rub up against, who would it be?
[2594.0s] Oh, Theo gets really quiet.
[2600.9s] I'll go get the next round.
[2602.0s] And she gets up and she walks up.
[2610.1s] Theo does not answer that question.
[2613.2s] She's an H Corps virgin.
[2614.7s] Flint, you're very quiet.
[2617.4s] What do you think about the end of the world?
[2619.4s] Well, I think we're kind of fucked either way.
[2621.1s] So let's dive in head first.
[2623.6s] What's the end of the world?
[2624.7s] And he knows it and he feels fine.
[2627.3s] Spotify.
[2628.1s] That's a Great Big C reference that Carla's not going to get.
[2630.9s] No, that's R.A.M.
[2632.4s] Yeah.
[2633.0s] Great Big C was a cover.
[2634.4s] It was a cover.
[2636.2s] There was a better version.
[2638.4s] Whoa.
[2642.0s] Sacrilege, R.A.M.
[2643.5s] They're both very similar.
[2648.0s] That's true.
[2649.0s] That's true.
[2651.2s] You're very open right now.
[2652.8s] I mean, this drink, it makes you feel bad.
[2659.4s] I come back with more drinks.
[2661.4s] Oh, good.
[2661.9s] More bad feelings.
[2664.3s] Are the drinks making you feel bad?
[2666.0s] No, it's the end of the world.
[2668.5s] No, it might be it's not.
[2670.8s] Come on, we're going to work so hard.
[2672.2s] We're going to punch the dragon in the face so many times.
[2675.3s] We're going to totally stop her.
[2676.9s] Don't worry about it.
[2677.6s] I've filled out all the paperwork for both the end of the world
[2680.5s] and not the end of the world.
[2682.0s] And there's more paperwork for the end of the world,
[2685.0s] which means it's probably what's going to happen
[2687.2s] because there's more work that went into that.
[2689.0s] So what you're saying is, you're done your job.
[2693.2s] You already did both directions.
[2695.8s] Hey, that sounds like we should drink to that.
[2698.0s] So you're off now.
[2699.3s] Here, here.
[2701.2s] And he drinks heavily and he passes out.
[2707.2s] So it wasn't a gentle pass out.
[2709.5s] I took him in a little bit.
[2711.9s] Poor guy.
[2713.6s] You carry on partying throughout the night,
[2716.0s] carrying Leosan around with you wherever you go.
[2720.5s] We're so excited that he came out with us.
[2722.9s] We don't want to let it go.
[2724.3s] Because we don't want to just leave him somewhere to wake up.
[2726.4s] Yeah, I know.
[2726.8s] That would be very unsettling.
[2728.0s] Oh, yeah.
[2728.4s] We bar hopped.
[2729.3s] We went to three other different taverns
[2732.3s] and we just left you at the yawning portal.
[2740.2s] Well, hello there.
[2741.2s] I'm your Dungeon Master Russ More.
[2742.9s] Thanks for joining us for episode 67 of Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[2746.9s] Where do we stand?
[2748.8s] I think we're standing in a pretty good place
[2750.5s] as far as the adventures go.
[2752.5s] And in real life, it's nearly the end of the year.
[2755.3s] It's gone by super fast.
[2757.5s] Super fast.
[2758.4s] Can't believe it.
[2759.7s] The next couple of weeks, we will be releasing
[2762.3s] a couple different and fun episodes
[2764.1s] to carry us through the holiday season.
[2766.1s] But just because they're different
[2767.7s] doesn't mean I haven't woven them into the story.
[2770.1s] I mean, everything is connected now, right?
[2773.2s] We hope you enjoy them.
[2775.2s] Being the holiday season, we are celebrating
[2777.0s] by hanging out with our patrons
[2778.4s] during our monthly Goog Hang.
[2779.6s] And this month we've moved it
[2780.9s] because our normal time would have been on Christmas Day.
[2784.0s] And I mean, we love everybody all that much,
[2787.5s] but they don't want to hang.
[2789.1s] You don't want to hang out with us on Christmas Day.
[2790.8s] You got family and friends to do that with.
[2793.6s] So this month, we're doing a morning Goog Hang
[2797.6s] on Saturday, December 22nd.
[2799.5s] And if you've been thinking about joining
[2800.8s] our Patreon community, we hope you consider
[2803.2s] jumping on this month.
[2804.3s] Because of the $2 plus levels,
[2806.1s] you'll be able to come hang out
[2807.6s] and share in the festivities.
[2809.1s] We'll talk about the episodes coming up,
[2810.9s] what everyone is doing for the holidays,
[2812.8s] and what we are all looking forward to in 2019.
[2816.8s] So Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
[2819.2s] is the place to visit
[2820.1s] and we hope to see you over there.
[2821.9s] That said, there are so many ways to support the show.
[2824.5s] If you listen to us and love the show,
[2826.4s] we're creating a review or share of an episode
[2829.6s] to a friend or family member goes a long way.
[2832.8s] And if you leave us a review,
[2833.9s] we'll gladly read it right here
[2835.9s] just to say how awesome you are.
[2838.1s] We collect reviews from iTunes
[2840.5s] and Stitcher specifically.
[2842.2s] So if you leave us a review somewhere else,
[2844.2s] just send us a little snapshot of that
[2846.5s] to either anywhere on social media
[2848.8s] or to our email and we will find it
[2851.0s] and thank you there.
[2852.8s] You can find all of our social media links
[2854.6s] and where to get ahold of us
[2855.5s] through our website dumbdragons.com
[2858.1s] and thanks to Sirenscape today
[2859.8s] for some of the amazing atmosphere,
[2861.6s] tons of the amazing atmosphere actually.
[2863.2s] This whole episode is filled with it.
[2864.9s] Just make sure you check them out at sirenscape.com
[2867.2s] and bring your games to life.
[2869.1s] Links for everything mentioned today
[2870.4s] can be found in the description.
[2872.4s] The next episode will be out Wednesday, December 26th.
[2876.3s] Let's see how the night ended for our adventurers
[2878.7s] and who still has their pants on.
[2880.5s] Spoiler alert, probably not Flint.
[2882.8s] Have a very Merry Christmas
[2884.1s] if that's what you celebrate.
[2885.3s] A wonderful winter solstice if it's not
[2888.3s] and we'll talk very soon.
[2895.8s] Where does everybody wake up in the morning?
[2898.4s] I wake up in my bed.
[2899.5s] I don't know.
[2901.2s] It doesn't get drunk drunk.
[2903.2s] I mean, I was real drunk.
[2904.6s] So like probably on the floor beside my bed.
[2907.8s] Probably the parking lot of a Denny's
[2909.4s] without your clothes on.
[2910.4s] That kind of drunk, is that what you were?
[2913.4s] I mean, you just said we carried Leosin around.
[2915.8s] So I can't imagine now you guys left me
[2917.9s] outside of Denny's, I hope.
[2921.1s] We're like, we got to make sure he gets home okay.
[2923.2s] You're on your own.
[2925.1s] You survive in the wilderness.
[2926.6s] He's soft.
[2927.5s] You're the godlike adventurer, he says.
[2930.0s] He's been pushing papers for a very long time.
[2932.1s] He may be able to punch fast, but he's not conscious.
[2937.6s] Okay, you guys wake up.
[2940.0s] And Flint, roll a d20.
[2943.9s] It's a 17.
[2945.5s] Okay, you're back to Flint.
[2947.6s] When you wake up.
[2949.9s] And you all head to Leosin's office and he looks pretty hard off.
[2957.5s] But he says, okay, so we're gonna go to the teleportation chamber.
[2964.0s] And I'm gonna send you guys to the places we talked about.
[2968.3s] Silvery Moon, and he points to Flint.
[2970.8s] High Forest, he points to Thea.
[2973.2s] And Mithril Hall, and he points to Nularaaa.
[2978.1s] Right?
[2978.4s] Can we all just move to the points that he was pointing at?
[2983.8s] Just to help him out.
[2985.2s] Got it.
[2986.0s] Good.
[2986.6s] Okay, let's go.
[2990.2s] You doing okay?
[2991.4s] Yeah, I'm good.
[2992.2s] Don't worry about it.
[2992.9s] Don't worry.
[2993.3s] I don't run the teleportation part of it.
[2995.2s] You go to Vom?
[2996.8s] Later.
[2997.8s] If you're gonna spew, spew into this, I'll put it onto the tel-
[3003.2s] And then it'll vanish it somewhere and somebody's gonna have a real bad day.
[3008.5s] Imagine some poor, like, I don't know, some halflings walking through the forest
[3013.3s] and out of nowhere just get hit by a stream of vomit.
[3020.0s] Don't do that to someone, Leosin, that'd be just terrible.
[3023.2s] All right, whoever's going, and then you get to the teleportation chamber
[3026.6s] and there are a couple wizards standing, waiting.
[3032.6s] And he says, all right, who's going first?
[3036.3s] I will.
[3038.1s] You step into the teleportation chamber, into the ruins,
[3043.1s] and the wizards begin reading their incantations.
[3047.7s] And the ruins begin to glow, and the haze begins to fill your vision,
[3052.2s] and your friends disappear from sight.
[3054.4s] I wave.
[3057.7s] And your vision begins to come back to you.
[3060.3s] Where are you?
[3061.6s] I am at the, at the, like, outskirts, the entrance, I guess, of Silvery Moon.
[3076.8s] Two guards are standing at the gate to Silvery Moon.
[3080.5s] The doors are barred, and they see you
[3087.4s] apparate in front of them, see the ruins,
[3090.7s] and they look like they're on guard when you become visible.
[3096.6s] But once the haze clears, they see you, and they lower their weapons, and they say,
[3102.0s] Ms. Amastasia, it's been a long, long time since you've been back.
[3109.0s] Quick, yes, come in.
[3110.6s] And they open the gates for you, and you head into Silvery Moon.
[3117.2s] I give them the curt nod.
[3121.9s] Back in Waterdeep.
[3123.2s] All right, who's next?
[3125.8s] Okay, I'll go.
[3126.5s] You step into the circle, and the runes begin to glow and move around you, swirling.
[3136.9s] Your vision of the room disappears.
[3139.6s] The haze begins to clear.
[3142.3s] Where are you, and what do you see?
[3146.1s] So I am in High Forest, which is where I grew up.
[3149.1s] So I am literally in the forest right now.
[3151.5s] And I think since it was, you know, fairly recently harvest time, it is autumn.
[3156.2s] So it's like really beautiful and colorful sort of deciduous trees everywhere as they're
[3162.8s] about to shed their fall leaves.
[3165.7s] And I'm going to head to, like, essentially my family's property.
[3173.4s] Like, you know, six brothers, but they all, you know, are in their own homes
[3177.6s] with their own families now, probably, but on the same property.
[3183.4s] You make your way to the outskirts of where you know the property to be, and you see
[3192.6s] a man tending, just kind of clearing a field of where a harvest had just taken place.
[3201.2s] Which of your brothers do you see?
[3203.9s] I see Verez.
[3207.6s] As you step closer, you
[3210.6s] make a mistake, snap a twig or something, something to catch his attention.
[3215.8s] I do not snap a twig.
[3217.7s] Thank you very much.
[3220.4s] My goodness.
[3221.6s] As you step forward, Donnie snaps a twig.
[3229.6s] And Verez turns around and sees you and Donnie walking up.
[3237.0s] First a little shock at seeing a gold dragon worming, but then seeing you,
[3241.6s] he drops everything in his hand and with a gasp says,
[3250.4s] Nulara.
[3254.3s] It's me.
[3254.9s] I'm home.
[3255.5s] How are you?
[3256.4s] And I kind of, like, speed up.
[3260.1s] You know, it's my brother.
[3261.1s] I'm not going to, like, run open-armed across a field, but, you know,
[3265.0s] I'm walking bristly.
[3266.2s] I'm very excited.
[3267.5s] He runs towards you and calls out, Nulara's back.
[3270.7s] Nulara's back.
[3272.8s] And you look around and you see people come out of the buildings that are built there.
[3280.9s] The literal woodwork.
[3282.4s] The literal woodwork.
[3283.9s] And you see all of your brothers and their,
[3287.5s] and their, what you can presume to be some of their children running out towards you.
[3294.3s] Back in Waterdeep.
[3300.1s] Well, like, you're last there, bud.
[3303.6s] You ready?
[3305.2s] Yeah, yeah, let's do this.
[3308.4s] You step into the circle and the same process that you've seen before,
[3312.4s] the wizards begin their incantation and the haze begins to fill your vision.
[3319.6s] And you, your vision comes back and
[3323.1s] where are you and what do you see?
[3326.3s] I'm in a spot I know very, very well.
[3328.8s] I'm at the hidden passage entrance to Mithril Hall.
[3332.8s] It looks just like a plain wall to the untrained eye,
[3336.9s] but if you know where to look, you know exactly where the door is.
[3341.2s] I do the sequence of movements needed to do with the loose stones on the door.
[3347.9s] And I unlocked the puzzle.
[3350.0s] I thought you were, like,
[3352.0s] Vogue-ing?
[3352.3s] Just Vogue.
[3354.4s] That would be amazing if I was.
[3358.4s] The door begins to grind open slowly.
[3362.5s] Inside you hear the workings of the inside of Mithril Hall,
[3369.2s] which are very familiar to you.
[3371.7s] And you step in and descend down into the heart of the mountain.
[3376.5s] And you see the entire city of Mithril Hall, which you haven't seen in a long, long time.
[3391.6s] We cut to somewhere else.
[3395.2s] It's black.
[3398.4s] You hear footsteps, kind of scuffling about, trying to find a place to go.
[3407.5s] You hear a voice, and it says,
[3410.4s] Um, hey, uh, hey, Victor?
[3415.7s] Victor, where'd you go?
[3418.8s] You hear footsteps walking closer to your position.
[3423.6s] Hey, it's not funny, man.
[3424.6s] Like, it's very dark in here.
[3429.4s] You see a sliver of white light begin to crack within the darkness.
[3437.3s] Hey, what are you, what are you doing over there?
[3441.7s] And it begins to tear open into the darkness.
[3445.8s] That's not, that's not good.
[3449.1s] And hands begin to reach out and begin prying apart the white light.
[3455.8s] And faces begin to be seen, ghostly, demonic faces.
[3461.7s] And the camera pans back, and you see the face of a ghostly Grancis.
[3472.5s] Oh boy, we're in trouble now.
[3492.5s] Some of the music in today's episode is by Kavin McLeod of Incompetech.Filmmusic.io
[3497.1s] and Scott Buckley at ScottBuckley.com.au.
[3500.9s] I'm just going to say, based on the decisions and the events unfolded by you and your team
[3508.0s] here, everybody, we'll decide who is in and who is out.
[3514.0s] Are actions in the past or in this meeting currently occurring?
[3518.4s] In the past or in this meeting currently occurring?
[3522.1s] Because I've already yelled at everybody, stood on a table, sat backwards on a chair.
[3526.8s] This here I'm showing on Skype is a scorecard based on all the decisions made.
[3534.4s] Why was there so many F's on it?
[3536.9s] Russ, this is fascinating.
[3538.3s] And what kind of math were you doing that there's a whole bunch of F's on it?
[3541.9s] Those are letters.
[3542.8s] Yeah, when did you start this sheet?
[3546.4s] Since the beginning of Rise of Tiamat.
[3549.3s] Oh my god, are you for real?
[3552.3s] Yeah.
[3552.9s] Russ, oh my god, that's amazing.
[3556.8s] Listeners, you should see his face right now.
[3558.6s] He looks like, I don't know, like a kid with like-
[3562.4s] He should be.
[3563.0s] This is all up to you.
[3566.4s] I mean, I hate it.
[3567.6s] I hate that you're saying that.
[3568.7s] We did our best, you guys.
[3569.6s] We did our best.
[3570.8s] It's kind of better because it means it's already decided, right?
[3575.1s] A long time coming.
[3576.0s] Yeah, it's not just spur of the moment.
[3578.4s] What if we're throwing those people in that river that one time?
[3586.4s] Nobody knows about that.
[3587.6s] That was before we recorded.
[3590.1s] That never happened.
[3590.8s] We never used to say Tiamat up in the river all the time.
[3594.2s] Amy didn't have that suggestion for us.
[3596.2s] You guys do with the prisoner ones.
[3597.2s] She said they and then you threw me right under the bus and into the river, Tom.
[3602.7s] After tying you up.
[3605.3s] They, I've been told that they find the chewing crunching of Paisley endearing.
[3611.6s] I don't know if that's what they meant.
[3615.1s] Look at it.
[3618.0s] Is quite loud.
[3618.8s] Go somewhere else.
[3622.5s] Oh my god, she got up.
[3624.4s] She left.
[3625.3s] Good girl.
[3626.5s] Oh my goodness.
[3627.1s] Good girl.
[3628.0s] Go for that positive reinforcement, Paisley.
[3629.9s] Jesus.
[3632.7s] Why is he looking at us?
[3635.7s] She's looking around the room.
[3638.0s] Not at anyone.
[3638.6s] No, I meant why is Russ looking at us?
[3642.4s] That not all of us.
[3644.2s] Well, I can't look at somebody.
[3650.7s] She goes, but not you, Donnie.
[3652.0s] You'll be fine.
[3652.8s] Donnie, you'll be good.
[3653.5s] Donnie will live on.
[3655.6s] Dog is audibly farting under the table.
[3657.9s] Oh, no.
[3659.8s] I like how Carla said, I know.
[3661.2s] And it's like, no, I said, oh, no.
[3663.5s] I said, oh, no.
[3665.4s] I know.
[3665.8s] I can hear the farts.
[3667.5s] I couldn't hear it.
[3668.4s] I can just hear the bone chewing.
[3669.9s] She's like, oh, god, I swear it's not me.
[3673.6s] Why are you looking at Austin Powers?
[3675.1s] Shit.
[3676.9s] Because of our other podcast.
[3678.5s] Russ, how many times do we need to tell you about this?
[3681.2s] I was also looking at you.
[3683.4s] So this is just something.
[3685.5s] Wait, was he dressed up as Austin Powers?
[3689.7s] You put your right foot in.
[3692.1s] You put your right foot.
[3693.8s] That's her incantations.
[3696.6s] It's the hokey pokey.
[3700.0s] I'm sorry.
[3701.1s] Keep going.
[3701.7s] You're doing great.
[3703.6s] Flint and Leosan wizards.
[3704.5s] No, you're just blind now.
[3706.0s] Exactly.
[3706.4s] Your vision disappeared.
[3707.4s] Sorry.
[3708.0s] They rolled poor on that one.
[3709.7s] You can't be hung over when you teleport.
[3711.6s] Did we not mention that?
[3713.2s] It does cause blindness.
[3713.8s] And then Leosan and Flint just go up to you and be like,
[3716.0s] hey, we're your brothers.
[3719.6s] Hey, welcome back.
[3720.7s] This is Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.